The Life of Chuck

 Outside we have clouds and drizzles and a lot of humidity.  Our temps are sitting in the low 70s (F), so we're warmer than we have been, but the chance of storms is going to be hanging around until tomorrow at least.

Since I send out a number of books and my handwriting is terrible, I bought myself a label maker.  Even though it was advertised as being able to print out mailing labels, the printer was incompatible with the Pirate Ship software I have started to use. So I returned it to Staples.  As unfortunate luck would have it, the woman in front of me was attempting to return a package to Amazon without a QR code, or even an email with which the clerk could look up the return.  She actually said to the clerk, "well... I thought you could do all of that."  Knowing this was going to take time, I was moved to a different desk where my return went quite smoothly.

Otherwise, yesterday went quite well.  I got a muscle building workout completed.  I know it was muscle building because Garmin told me so.

Then, last evening I went to the movies, however on my way to the theater I had to stop and save a large turtle that was wanting to cross a busy road.  When I drove past him and realized he was basically going to commit suicide, I put on my four way flashers and pulled to the side of the road.  Waving my arms to move traffic into the center lane, I hurried back to him and picked him up.  Big meaning he weighed about 5 pounds, his shell was over a foot long and about 8 inches wide.  And as I lifted him off the macadam he eyed me and then hissed.  He's the third turtle I've save since moving here, so I guess you could say we're rather turtly. 

The movie I saw was The Life of Chuck.  I thoroughly enjoyed it.  Very different.  It's based on a short story by Stephen King.  It's the story of Chuck Krantz, a 39 year-old accountant who's dying of brain cancer.  While there are some sad moments, you learn that Chuck's life had quite a lot of joy and happiness.  What gave him the most joy?  Maybe dancing.  Believe me, seeing Tom Hiddleston dance is simply amazing.

And, of course, the question of the hour is are we going to have TACOs in the Middle East?  Word is that Orangie's blow bro Vlad is furious about Orangie's possible intent to attack Iraq, Vlad's bestie in the Middle East.  This is how Vlad learns that Orangie's loyalty only runs one way.  It doesn't make a difference how hard Vlad worked to get Orangie elected, in the end Orangie will do what he believes will serve his own ego the best.  The word is that if Orangie bombs Iraq than Tulsi Gabbard, one of the most powerful Russian assets in this administration will quit, and that would indicate a serious breakup between Orangie and Vlad.  Only one thing is certain, everybody is talking about Orangie and that is the only thing he cares about.

On a lighter note, Noem, the puppy killer, was taken to a DC hospital yesterday.  Evidently she had some sort of allergic reaction to a cosmetic procedure.

Sinkers

Can you believe it's Monday already?

Did I tell you I don't have to go to work today?
Yesterday afternoon I did an FTP test, (Functional Threshold Power).  FTP is a good way to measure your fitness as a cyclist using wattage / kilograms (that's right, no pounds used here).  You ride a 10 minute warm up, followed by 20 minutes where you're supposed to push your limits, ending with a 10 minute cool down segment.  Being the first time I've taken this test, I made a few mistakes:  I slowed down to change gears and pretty much came to a stop for almost a minute - no wattage was recorded.  Damn!  My final score was 1.71 watts kg.  That's higher than the average of 1.41, but lower than I want.  Even at my age, a decent cyclist should have a 2.0.  I have my work cut out for me, don't I?
And what about the Idiot Jerk in the White House?  Holy Crap!  Heading into an impeachment trial, some dumb shit in his Administration thought assassinating Soleimani, however the attack also took out an Iraqi general.  Now Iraq wants the US off its soil.  And the Idiot Jerk is now threatening them with sanctions if they don't let American soldiers stay.  Oops.  And he's shrieking how they owe us money for the bases we've set up there.  Oops.  Oh, and we're now sending an additional 3000 troops to... well, hell if I know... maybe Saudi Arabia... except I believe they have a limit as to how many American troops can be on their soil.  Oh, and Lindsey Belle Graham wants the Senate to change it's rules so they can begin the impeachment trial ASAP.  That's because they thought the turd they thought was going to float even higher is doing anything but... float.  The Idiot Jerk will never be anything more than a real sinker.

Tread on Me

Sometimes the stars do align!  On my work calendar... today is my Friday!!  Of course our weather forecasters are calling for a drizzly wizzly weekend. 
My first book on Scotland arrives today:

A friend asked me "will Eli and Max be wearing kilts in their new adventure?"  Honestly, I hadn't given the idea much thought, though I have to admit having them wear woolly tartans is rather appealing.
Two nights ago Biggie had an issue with the stairs.  He made it about halfway up before his foot slipped and he went bangity bang down them.  Scared the crap out of me.  He was fine, but I realized I needed to tack down something to make them less slippery.  So last evening, rather than ride my bike, I laid down stair treads.  And, of course, neither dog wanted to walk on them.  Lily kept her paws off them, using bare stair to either the left or right.  Biggie simply refused... until I stood at the top waving a biscuit.  You'd have thought I was waving a sirloin steak.  Two days from now, neither will know those treads are even there.
And I guess our government is warning civilians to leave Iraq.  All because of the Idiot Jerk in the White House.  And in this country, farmers in the mid-west planted corn rather than soybeans because of the Idiot Jerk's tariffs... and there were a lot of failures.  The Republican party is preparing to devour itself.  That's life.  Perhaps if they hadn't so desperately wanted to rule the world.  Karma is coming.  It is going to be really ugly.