Spilled paint, and other lies

Yesterday afternoon I had a woman call to complain - the can of paint they'd bought the night before had broken.  "What do you mean broke?" I asked.  "It broke all over the rug," she replied, "and we need a new can of paint."  "You need another can of paint?" I asked.  "Yes, cause the other one broke."
Well, paint cans don't really break.  The lid may come off if you drop it on the floor, and sometimes, if we tint it and don't hammer on the top on tight enough there might be a problem.  If there is a problem, it's going to happen well before you get home.  Anyway, after a minute or so of this conversation her husband got on a 2nd line (that's right, I got to speak to both of them simultaneously) and repeated what she had said, except he wanted to speak to the manager because their can of paint spilled and they needed another.  Now this guy was obviously giving me a line of shit.  All they wanted was another can of paint.  And, of course, we are 'customer service, customer service, customers service oriented I said "let me put you on hold so I can get this approved through the store manager," (who was not in the store yesterday).  After a bit I resumed the call and told him to bring in the empty gallon with the lid.

So, about 20 minutes later this dude shows up, who was neither the husband nor the wife, with an empty gallon paint in a supermarket bag, and asks for a gallon of white semi-gloss.  I pointed out that the can he had was satin, not semi-gloss and this dude says "he told me I'm supposed to get semi-gloss."  "Sorry," I said, "I can't give you semi-gloss when you bought satin."  He made a little bit of a frowny face and said "okay."

When I asked Cori, one of my associates, what she thought she said.  "They just needed another gallon of paint, probably for trim."  Of course, she was right.  The can was missing the tell-tale signs of a spillage.  You see you don't get drip runs down the sides of a can when it spills, just a long solid streak where it sits in the spilled paint.  This can had drip runs and brush marks.  These people just lied to get a free can of paint.  And it was obvious through the conversation that they knew, that we knew, they were lying.  This is life in the retail world. 

Deadpool rising

It's been one of those weeks, if you know what I mean.  I had to deal with a customer who called Corporate and complained about one of my associates - never a fun thing.  The claim was that my associate treated her so rudely, this customer probably would never shop with us again.  So, I called her and arraigned for her to come in the next time I worked, and of course she lied, and she lied another time two days later when she bought the most expensive paint we offer and wanted it at the lowest price possible.  And though she's now sitting smugly at home thinking she pulled one over on us, she's been red-flagged in the system.
Anyway, I went to see Deadpool last night.  I was impressed as, evidently, quite a few other people have been since it appears to be raking in money.  It's very funny, lots of one liners, so many in fact you really have to pay attention to what's being said - that's a good point, the audience stays focused.

I like the fact that's it's geared for an adult audience rather then a family audience, I'm not 14 so don't treat me like I am.  In spite of the fact that at times it plays like a comedy, this film takes itself very seriously.  I thought that the drama of a late stage cancer diagnosis was juxtaposed against Deadpool's revenge nearly seamlessly, and the mutation scenes definitely did not have a Saturday matinee family audience in mind when they were filmed.  It has bad language, nudity, and violence.  What else could I ask for after dealing with a blonde bimbo trying to rip me off at the store?

Cynical me

Just call me cynical, but I'm not one of those who automatically believes everything I'm being told.  Here's an example.  Last evening we had a female customer come to the paint desk and order 12 gallons of our most expensive paint in different colors.  That's a nice sale, let me tell you.  However, every color needed to be adjusted down.  She had paint swatches stapled on top of paint swatches and scribbled notes on all of them.  Three of the swatches had no notes because she'd just pulled them from the 'color wall.'  As she handed them to me she said, "this one needs to be adjusted down 65%,  this one 75%, and this one adjust down as much as possible."  When I told her there was no way of telling how what they would look like, she said, "it doesn't make a difference, they just need to be adjusted."

She then asked about 'frosting' applications for windows.  One of my female associates took her back to show her what we had.  When my associate came front I said to her "that woman has special needs."  My associate said, "but you don't know, she has a teenage daughter who's quadriplegic, she, herself, has Lyme Disease and my possibly lose her arm, and they've been evicted from their home because of mold."  "Right," I responded cynically.  At this point the customer returned to the paint desk and said, in a very rushed voice, "I can't wait for my paint to be finished.  I need to go home.  My caregiver is leaving."  And I said "your paint is finished, let me load it in your cart for you."

After the customer had left the desk, my female associate said, "oh, that poor, poor woman."  And I said, "that woman is nuttier then a fruit cake, and she just handed you a slice."  It was either that or she was trying to get free paint.  Ah, just call me cynical.