Asparagus Pee and the GOP

Because asparagus is one of my favorite vegetables, I usually eat it at least once a month, sometimes more often, depending upon how fresh it looks at the supermarket.  As always, when I went to the bathroom an hour or so later I smelled the now familiar asparagus pee.  I did a little research and the source of the odor is something called asparagustic acid, which is created during digestion.  About 60% of all of the people who eat asparagus get to smell this perfume.  Science is split on whether the other 40% either have sniffers which fail to detect the odor, or manage to suppress it.  I think they just have bad sniffers, just like a lot of the members of the GOP.  If you ask me, this is pretty obvious especially when you consider John Boehner's decision this past week to create a 'special committee' to investigate Benghazi.   He evidently doesn't realize how stinky that issue has become.  Sure, many of the GOP's base did achieve hands free orgasms when he made the announcement, but, like the 40% claiming they don't smell their asparagus pee, these voters don't smell a thing.  One can only surmise they are still beating this dead horse because mid-term elections are coming up and they want to keep their majority in the House.

I understand where they're coming from: they used heavy artillery to try and take down Obamacare and failed.  Not only did they fail, they made the party look bad.  Now that the Affordable Care Act is up and running, with something like 7.5 million Americans enrolled, we see that the economy hasn't collapsed.  In fact, Friday's unemployment figures proved it is still growing.  Their arguments against it failed to materialize.  They need something to attack both the Presidency and the Democratic Party and all they have is Benghazi.  I can tell you, after talking to some people at work, bringing up Benghazi is some real stinky pee.  Nobody cares because it's old news.  The problem is the GOP desperately wants a life preserver yet the only thing they have to grab onto are rocks.  It's like they are eating asparagus with every meal and all the while claiming 'my pee don't stink.'  It does, and you don't need to be in the same bathroom to smell it. 

Tea Party - Still lying through their teeth

So, I know there are a lot of people out there who believe the Tea Party is the best thing for this country since sliced bread.  They see it's leaders as honest, true patriotic Americans who are working only for the betterment of the country.  If you listen to them the Affordable Healthcare Act is worse then the bubonic plague; insurance rates will rise and jobs will be lost.  Personally, I think they are full of shit.  Yesterday I received my Benefits Annual Enrollment Guide.  Anxiously I ripped open the plastic sealers.  I needed to see how much my payroll deductions were going to be.  Would it be too much for my paycheck to bear?  Would I have to buy bargain basement dog food?  I prayed that they stay somewhere in the range of what I was already paying, just shy of $180 dollars a month.  But, of course, that was not to be.  To my gleeful surprise my monthly deductions was... falling... not like a rock, mind you, but enough to make a significant difference in my paycheck.  How much less will I be paying per month?  $39.00  As I did the calculations over and over again I could almost hear the rising tide of Tea Party voices wailing "This Can Not BE!"

Now I will be the first to admit that everybody else in the country is going to mirror me.  There are unscrupulous companies out there who don't give a damn about their associates.  I would not be surprised if there were several companies owned by Conservative Republicans which actually raise their employee rates.  You see, they don't care if they hurt their associates just as long as they get their point across.  They are going to make their political point no matter how much they have to gouge their employees.  Nothing is going to change them.

Boil in water for two minutes, then add milk and sugar to make palatable

So why all the clamor from the Tea Party about the Affordable Healthcare Act?  Well, for one thing, I've always suspected they really are nothing moer then bags with loud voices.  Secondly, this is legislation which was passed under President Obama and they hate him.  Thirdly, they are terrified that when all of the working class 'joes' who make up their core start seeing the benefits they might start saying "hey, this ain't too bad."  That would be terrible news for the Tea Party.  They might start losing elections.  I mean why would any sane person want to vote for a lying sack of shit.