Red Herrings

Remember those collars I ordered for the dogs?  Well, they're not here yet. As an Amazon Prime Member I get 24 hour shipping on most things.  I ordered them on the 18th, a few hours later they arrived at the shipping facility (Parkland, Md) and 45 minutes later those collars were out for delivery.   For those interested, Parkland is 124 miles away.  Right.  20 hours later I got a delay message: 'possible delay, product arrived at the wrong shipper facility.'  There was no activity on Sunday.  On Monday, they shipped from Parkland and in the same minute were delayed - wrong shipper facility.  The same thing happened yesterday.  I chatted with Amazon.  They gave me a $5 credit on my next purchase.  Of course, no one knows where the collars are.  Oh, and they were shipped through the US Postal Service.  If the collars don't arrive today, I can file for a full refund tomorrow. Yippee.
Yesterday afternoon I had the joy of sitting at my car dealership for 45 minutes while they reprogrammed my ignition coil...  My recall was not related to a specific part, rather, there was a glitch in the programming which on some occasions continued running the ignition after the motor started.  Everything is fixed now.  The code is in order.

red her·ring

/ˈˌred ˈheriNG/

noun

1. 1.

   a dried smoked herring, which is turned red by the smoke.

   Similar:

   bluff

   blind

   ruse

   feint

   deception

   subterfuge

   hoax

   trick

   ploy

   device

   wile

   sham

   pretense

   artifice

   cover

   smokescreen

   distraction

   expedient

   contrivance

   machination

   dodge

   put-on

   put-up job
2. 2.

   something, especially a clue, that is or is intended to be misleading or distracting.

   "the book is fast-paced, exciting, and full of red herrings"

Can you hear my evil laugh now?

And Moscow Mitch struck up the crazy, conservative, republican band yesterday and played the tune everybody was expecting to hear.  He is a desperate man struggling to keep the Idiot Jerk's base from questioning... anything.  He wants to make sure those little republican robots pull the little republican lever when they're in the voting booth 10 months from now.  He realizes the truth.  In 2016 droves of voters stayed away from the polls because they believe Hillary was going to win.  They may not have liked her, but they decided to stay home and let other Centrist voters put her into office.  While those voters sat on their hands, the Idiot Jerk's base showed up at the polls in droves.  In spite of that, he still lost the popular vote, slinking into office through the Electoral College.  In 2020, all those Centrists who didn't vote are going to lined up to pull the lever.  The Idiot Jerk is going to be fired.  Moscow Mitch understands this quite well, so he will do anything and everything to keep the republican base loyal.  At this point he's no doubt praying for a marginal lose by the Idiot Jerk.  Sorry, that ain't going to happen.